she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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