I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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