It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
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I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
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GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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