I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
