I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
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Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
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Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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