Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize