how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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