I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
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