you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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