Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.