I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
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