Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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