i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
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