he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
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We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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