Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Randomize
