Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
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