We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
