I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
