OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.