"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?