I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
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My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
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You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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