I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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