Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
where does the pee come out of this thing
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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