don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize