i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
