Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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