im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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