btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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