Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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