I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize