Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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