so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
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