I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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