And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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