don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
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Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
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Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.