i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize