These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
