so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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