you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Boobs speak an international language.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize