Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
These 23 Kids Have The Most Overbearing Parents Imaginable
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
21 People That Are Skilled At Illegal Activities
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.