This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
