There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵