She is in my trunk
someone threw a dead crab at me
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
