Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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