I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
its liver damage thursday
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize