So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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