It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
