the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize