i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
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