We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
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